Memoirs from RAD & Trauma-Parenting Families

There’s nothing like hearing from someone who has walked the same road. Memoirs from foster, adoptive, and kinship parents raising children with attachment struggles—including Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD)—offer more than just stories. They provide validation, perspective, and hard-earned wisdom. These books pull back the curtain on the day-to-day realities of parenting kids with complex trauma, giving you insight, encouragement, and a reminder that you are not alone.

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• But, He Spit in my Coffee: A reads-like-fiction memoir about adopting a child with Reactive Attachment Disorder
  (Keri Williams)
  This book will enable your family, friends experience for themselves what raising a RAD kid is like. It will enable therapists and other service providers to see for themselves the nuances of a family in crisis. Available in paperback, audio, and e-book and is always free on Kindle Unlimited.
• Chasing Lilly
  (Nealie Rose)
  An honest account of a little girl whose family never gives up on her despite her struggle with RAD.
• Detached; Surviving and thriving with RAD: In his own words
  (Jessie Hogsett)
  Diagnosed with RAD at the age of 12, Jessie and grew up acting out of the hurt and trauma of his early childhood. His book is an invaluable window into the psyche of a child struggling to overcome developmental trauma.
• Everything you Ever Wanted
  (Jillian Lauren)
  The story of adopting an Ethiopian child with special needs and struggling to help him feel safe in the world.
• Just
  (Elea Lee)
  This is a devastating story of a family struggling to love and raise two adopted foster children. When they discover one of the children has been sexually preying on the other, the system utterly fails them.
• Me, The Boy, and the Monster
  (Cat McGill)
  ‘The Monster’ is what the family calls her son’s trauma-fueled behaviors, a way of personifying the problem and giving it an identity separate from him. This distinction is at the core of the book and is incredibly helpful when sharing the book with family, friends, and others. Read my full review here
• No Matter What: An Adoptive Family’s Story of Hope, Love and Healing
  (Sally Donovan)
  A story of early childhood trauma, RAD, adoption – and the struggle to find the right help and resources. This is a particularly hopeful book.

• Raising A Thief
  (Paul Podolsky)
  The story of a couple adopting a girl from Ukraine only to discover that she seems unable to form attachments and has no conscience. It also delves into the adoptive mother’s traumatic childhood Russia and the generational trauma in that country, with further discussion of how the parents’ unresolved trauma interacts with the child’s creating a cycle.
• Rescuing Julia Twice
  (Tina Traster)
  The story of a foreign adoption of a girl with inhibited RAD (setting this apart as most memoirs are about disinhibited RAD).
• Second Time Foster Child
  (Toni Hoy)
  As Daniel, adopted as a toddler, grew older, he began to show signs of serious mental illness that manifested in violent outbursts. When his parents exhausted all other options, they decided to relinquish custody to the state to get Daniel the treatment he needed.
• The Price of Silence
  (Liza Long)
  The story of a mother struggling to raise a child with violent outbursts as she was disbelieved and demonized by those around her. Ultimately, her child was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, a comorbidity of many children with RAD.
• Relinquished “When Love Means Letting Go”
  (Carrie O’Toole)
  A heartbreaking story of love and loss that shows us that sometimes relinquishment is the best option for everyone.
• Love Never Quits: Surviving and Thriving After Infertility, Adoption and Reactive Attachment Disorder
  (Gina Heumann)
  True story of a family who successfully found treatment for their child who had Reactive Attachment Disorder.
• End of the Rainbow: A Memoir of a Mother’s Journey
  (Valerie Dawn)
  Travel with Valerie as she explains what it was like to become a foster parent, adopt, and be “that mother.”

Didn’t find what you are looking for? Check out: Tools to Help Others Understand RAD & Attachment Trauma