How to love a child who doesn’t love you back

By Lynn K. Sollitto, brave mom, author and RAD advocacy hero

I instantly fell in love with my biological son when he was born. It was primitive and instinctual. I would have done anything for him.

I also fell in love with my adopted daughter Paige right away when I looked down at the small bundle sucking on the edge of the blanket. I had witnessed her birth.

It wasn’t the same with Payton. She was dropped off at our doorstep as an infant when she was taken into foster care. We adopted her a year later because her parents were unable to reunify permanently. My love for her was not instinctual or immediate. It took time to grow and looks different than the love I have for my two other children.

I thought I knew how to love before Payton became my daughter. When she was diagnosed with reactive attachment disorder, however, I knew I’d have to adjust my definition of love. I would need to change my definition of love from a feeling into an action.

Read the full story here.

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